I MISS THEM!!! Yep, I miss "the good ol days"! As much as I love the modern conveniences of life as we know it, I miss the days of my childhood. I miss having one phone in a central location, "rabbit ears", the singing of the National Anthem at the end of the television broadcast day, no answering machines or cell phones. I miss that simpler time. The days before social media...ya know, when people thought you had money if you had an electric typewriter and that you were a millionaire if you had a computer at home! Yep, those days are the ones I miss! Don't get me wrong...I LOVE reconnecting with friends and loved ones via Facebook and email but wasn't life just a little less harried "back in the day"? Sure, we were busy - out and about but if we were out and about we were untouchable to a degree. Anyone who needed us would have to wait until we got home to get us. There wasn't a constant state of "connected-ness".
I'm forever watching "retro" television. It drives my tribe NUTS!!! My husband constantly ribs me about watching "old tv" and asking me why I want to watch those shows. I think it's because while I'm watching Match Game, The Carol Burnett Show, Gilligan's Island, All in the Family, et al I transported back to that simpler time...the good ol days. A time in my life when my biggest concern was passing an English test or wondering if my high school football team win that week. In reality, I think it mostly revolves around the fact that while I'm watching The Carol Burnett Show or Laverne and Shirley I'm transported (mentally at least) back to my childhood. Back to the days when my "original" family, my first family was intact and life was simple (for me at least)...a time when all three of us were all still on this big blue planet - present in the body. In my mind's eye, I can see my Dad standing at the stove shaking that big stock pot with oil, salt and kernels in the bottom to make popcorn. No microwave or air poppers back then. I can see my Mom laying on the floor in the den with her "husband" pillow; blanket thrown over the vent in the floor to capture all the heat blowing up from the oil furnace. I can see (and sometimes even smell) the live Christmas tree we had every Christmas with the big multi-colored bulbs and the silver tinsel topped with snow from a can. I can see it and smell it and it makes me smile and ache all that same time. It's weird because I'm so blessed and happy in the present...but sometimes I just long for a few moments of the "old days".
I hope that at some point my children, when they are grown and living on their own, they will look back at this time in their lives, their childhood, with the same fondness that I have when I look back on mine. I hope that they see their dad and me "doing" and "being" and I pray it makes them smile.
I think after you release a parent into eternity, the "old days" take on new meaning. As an adult, I've always cherished my childhood and the days at home with my folks. I didn't cherish them while they were happening...I was too busy growing up and too young to realize how absolutely magical those moments, days, weeks, months, years really were - how I wish I'd known!!! I'd have made a point to soak up every hug, smile, laugh, joke and yes even the moments of being disciplined (Yes, even I had to be corrected and sometimes it even required a spanking!! SHOCKING, I know! LOL)
I encourage my children to soak up every moment and to be present in every moment because moments only happen once. It's hard for kids to be present in the moment...but I continue to encourage them to do it. There are so many things that I can only vaguely recall from my childhood and young adulthood...I know there was so much FUN but I can't remember the details. I often have people ask me, "Hey, do you remember when we..." or "Do you remember the time we..." and it makes me sad that I can't always say yes.
I really can't explain the ache or longing that sometimes creeps in but I do know that it brings a beautiful mixture of laughter and tears. Laughter because it all happened and tears because I'll never pass that way again. Make the most of every moment and BE THERE...be ALL THERE!
Wednesday, January 15, 2020
Tuesday, January 14, 2020
Holidays past
NOTE: I started this post during the holidays this year but never published...so here it is.
I find myself a little more sentimental this year than last...it's interesting. Interesting because I keep thinking that it'll get better, that the tears won't be so close and the longing won't be so deep but it doesn't...get better. I had a very dear friend tell me it doesn't get better, it gets different...not better ` we get stronger but it's never better... just different. She's right! I do find that I'm stronger (most days) but that feeling never goes away...never gets better. As the days pass, it just feels different.
The last few weeks, I find myself remembering. Remembering holidays past and it makes me smile and it makes me cry but mostly for that moment the longing seems to ease if only for a moment. I hear an old Christmas tune and I remember Christmases spent at Fincastle in the parsonage. The smell of the real Christmas tree and the oil heat. I can hear my Dad popping popcorn in the metal pot that he had to shake back and forth over the eye of the electric stove. I can see my mom in her spot on the floor - blanket thrown over the vent to catch the heat as it blows and inflates her blanket (that was a coveted spot, by the way. I remember Christmas programs in the sanctuary at Fincastle. At the end, Santa would come down the center aisle and all the kids would go home with brown bags full of fruit and candies. I remember big coats, snowy nights and dinners at my grandparents. Nanny Ross' homemade chocolate pies and the coleslaw and ham and Nanny Bruce's. I remember the coal burning stove that heated Papaw and Nanny Ross' house and the buckstove at Papaw and Nanny Bruce's house.
I look back fondly at the holidays I spent with wonderful friends who were more like family while I was at Lee College (University) and at Disney and couldn't get home for the holidays or had to go a little later due to work. Those are still special times and bring a smile when I recall them.
There are so many memories and they are so vivid that most of the time I can smell all those smells. Occasionally, I'll get a whiff of a scent and I'm suddenly 7 years old all wide-eyed with Christmas wonder. It's not that I miss being 7 years old really but I miss that time. A time before smart phones, personal computers and cable TV. It really was a kinder, simpler, "gentler" time. I miss the faces that sat around the table and those smells and that feeling of excitement. Most of all, I miss my Dad. I know that for the last 3 years, Dad has had a seat at the best banquet and he is surrounded by those faces that I miss. He is happier than he could ever be here in this world...but I miss him. I will miss him for as long as I'm in this earthly vessel but I know where he is and that he is happy and well and safe and I find comfort in knowing this truth.
I find myself a little more sentimental this year than last...it's interesting. Interesting because I keep thinking that it'll get better, that the tears won't be so close and the longing won't be so deep but it doesn't...get better. I had a very dear friend tell me it doesn't get better, it gets different...not better ` we get stronger but it's never better... just different. She's right! I do find that I'm stronger (most days) but that feeling never goes away...never gets better. As the days pass, it just feels different.
The last few weeks, I find myself remembering. Remembering holidays past and it makes me smile and it makes me cry but mostly for that moment the longing seems to ease if only for a moment. I hear an old Christmas tune and I remember Christmases spent at Fincastle in the parsonage. The smell of the real Christmas tree and the oil heat. I can hear my Dad popping popcorn in the metal pot that he had to shake back and forth over the eye of the electric stove. I can see my mom in her spot on the floor - blanket thrown over the vent to catch the heat as it blows and inflates her blanket (that was a coveted spot, by the way. I remember Christmas programs in the sanctuary at Fincastle. At the end, Santa would come down the center aisle and all the kids would go home with brown bags full of fruit and candies. I remember big coats, snowy nights and dinners at my grandparents. Nanny Ross' homemade chocolate pies and the coleslaw and ham and Nanny Bruce's. I remember the coal burning stove that heated Papaw and Nanny Ross' house and the buckstove at Papaw and Nanny Bruce's house.
I look back fondly at the holidays I spent with wonderful friends who were more like family while I was at Lee College (University) and at Disney and couldn't get home for the holidays or had to go a little later due to work. Those are still special times and bring a smile when I recall them.
There are so many memories and they are so vivid that most of the time I can smell all those smells. Occasionally, I'll get a whiff of a scent and I'm suddenly 7 years old all wide-eyed with Christmas wonder. It's not that I miss being 7 years old really but I miss that time. A time before smart phones, personal computers and cable TV. It really was a kinder, simpler, "gentler" time. I miss the faces that sat around the table and those smells and that feeling of excitement. Most of all, I miss my Dad. I know that for the last 3 years, Dad has had a seat at the best banquet and he is surrounded by those faces that I miss. He is happier than he could ever be here in this world...but I miss him. I will miss him for as long as I'm in this earthly vessel but I know where he is and that he is happy and well and safe and I find comfort in knowing this truth.
Monday, January 13, 2020
When God is silent
NOTE: Another started but unpublished until now post. I've come a bit further in the journey since I initially started writing this post.
Over the last 2 years I've heard a lot of things. I've heard my children laugh, cry and argue. I've heard my husband tell me he loves me and heard him cutting up with the kids. I've heard a lot of sermons, scripture, encouraging words but one thing I haven't heard the voice of God speak to me. He's been silent.
I can say that I've felt His presence, while not necessarily realizing until later that it was indeed His presence in the form of a friend hugging my neck, sending a note, or giving me a reassuring look...I know that it was the Heavenly Father working through folks to minister comfort to my broken spirit.
So, when God is silent is it because He really isn't talking or is it because I'm not listening or can't hear Him because of the chaos in my mind and heart? Let me tell ya, there's been A LOT of that in the last 2 years!!! I have struggled with trusting God and feeling like my prayers are effective. It has seemed to me that the things for which I've prayed have gone the opposite way. Well, opposite of MY will...there's the rub. Why is God's will not my will and visa versa? My will should be that God's will be done in my life and the lives of those I love...right?
Over the last 2 years I've heard a lot of things. I've heard my children laugh, cry and argue. I've heard my husband tell me he loves me and heard him cutting up with the kids. I've heard a lot of sermons, scripture, encouraging words but one thing I haven't heard the voice of God speak to me. He's been silent.
I can say that I've felt His presence, while not necessarily realizing until later that it was indeed His presence in the form of a friend hugging my neck, sending a note, or giving me a reassuring look...I know that it was the Heavenly Father working through folks to minister comfort to my broken spirit.
So, when God is silent is it because He really isn't talking or is it because I'm not listening or can't hear Him because of the chaos in my mind and heart? Let me tell ya, there's been A LOT of that in the last 2 years!!! I have struggled with trusting God and feeling like my prayers are effective. It has seemed to me that the things for which I've prayed have gone the opposite way. Well, opposite of MY will...there's the rub. Why is God's will not my will and visa versa? My will should be that God's will be done in my life and the lives of those I love...right?
Sunday, January 12, 2020
Tis the season
This holiday season has been a season of reflection for me. As we make the journey to the manager during this season of Advent, I'm reminded of the great love of our Heavenly Father. I am aware of it on most days but this year, for some reason, I am made more keenly aware.
I LOVE the season of Advent!!! I love the lights, the food, the time away from work, but I mostly enjoy the time spent with loved ones. There are many loved ones who are no longer able to celebrate this season here on earth with us and that leaves a huge holes - gaps in our lives that can never be filled again in this first world. Life moves forward for us but in a very different way. That hole, that loss, that infinite missing and longing...it never really gets "better" it's just different. It's a wound that never really heals. As time passes, it forms a protective covering but it's very thin and can be ripped away by something as commonplace as a scent or a song. We laugh and celebrate but always with an ache...sometimes it takes our breath away and other times it causes our cheeks to glisten with tears for a time gone by but more often it brings a warm feeling way down deep knowing that we are so much richer for having loved those folks so deeply.
I miss my Dad. I make no excuses...I miss him every day and feel his absence in a very real ways every day. Sometimes that missing brings a flood of tears, sometimes a feeling of inconsolable longing but mixed with that is ALWAYS a warmth and love that is inexplicable...I can't describe it, it's something you have to experience. People tire of hearing about the loss of our loved ones but I don't think I'll ever be ready to stop talking about my Dad. Giving him over to eternity has brought to the forefront the loss of my grandparents. I miss them more now then I did when the loss was fresh. I think it also has a great deal to do with the fact that my own children are growing up...entirely too quickly, might I add! I am beginning to realize that sooner than I'm really ready for it, things are going to change within my four walls. I think that only adds to my reflective state.
My Dad's passing has also made me more intentional with my Mom. My mom is not the type to gush and smooch and hug...I'm like that as well. However, I think since Dad's death we've both become more intentional with the expression of our love - showing it rather than it just being inferred. I'm not going to lie, it's difficult for me because by nature I'm just not that way. I can be that way and many of my treasured friends will tell you that they may randomly receive big mushy emails or messages from me during particularly nostalgic times (which probably annoy them...sorry). I've just come to realize that the people we love won't always be here with us. Many things can separate us from those we love...death, geography and change. So, I decided that those I love would never have to wonder - I'm going to tell them while I have them in their earthly vessels that I love them and that they are treasured by me. That's one regret I don't have with my Dad...I knew he loved me and he knew I loved him. The people who are precious to our hearts...they should know it! We should tell them! Don't say, "I'll tell them tomorrow"or "I'll see them again sometime"! If geography prevents a visit...send them a note! If you can see them...squeeze them tight and tell them you love them! If it's an old friend, tell them how treasured your time together is in your heart and that you love them. Tell your family...show the people around you that you love them! BE INTENTIONAL!
This season in my life is interesting...it's a melting pot of emotions from all directions. It's a blessing and curse - my heart wells up when I think of the many people who have touched and continue to touch my life, whether near or far. It also brings a sense of sadness that many of you are far away (separated by geography or circumstance) no matter the situation, I hold each of you close in my heart.
I miss my Dad but am so very grateful that my Mom is able to spend the holidays with us. We don't talk too much about Dad or memories when we're together...I think it's too hard and we haven't come far enough in the journey to do it without tears. It's odd that even as an adult I still don't know what to do with my Mother's tears. But those moments from the past are shared with a knowing look or a random remark. We share the same memories, albeit from different perspectives.
I have a red berry & cedar candle that I burn every year at Christmas time...reminds me of Christmases when I was the preacher's daughter at Fincastle UMC. That simple candle brings back a flood of wonderful memories for me along with mixed emotions of happiness and longing. Sometimes I long for the days "up the valley" in house heated by an oil furnace, the only phone in the house hanging on the wall in the kitchen, rabbit ear antennas, TVs with no remote, a Christmas tree sprayed with canned snow and lit by multi-colored lights with GIANT bulbs and stockings full of fruit and candy canes. I miss the silver tree with the color wheel at my Nanny's house and the homemade chocolate pie but one thing that I don't have to miss...THE LOVE! I feel that love every time a memory comes to mind and while I can't hug those necks, their love crosses the veil of Heaven like a gentle breeze and sweeps over me and warms my heart, makes me smile and yes, brings a tear.
I am infinitely grateful for the blessing of my life and the life my husband and I have made with our children. Life is a journey and ours is full of twists and turns, ups and downs and everything in between but the one thing that is constant is LOVE! We love each other through it all.
I pray that this Christmas and every day beyond brings each of us the love of those we have in our lives and those who are loving us from the other shore and that we seize EVERY opportunity to LOVE!
Merry Christmas!
The Preacher's Daughter
I LOVE the season of Advent!!! I love the lights, the food, the time away from work, but I mostly enjoy the time spent with loved ones. There are many loved ones who are no longer able to celebrate this season here on earth with us and that leaves a huge holes - gaps in our lives that can never be filled again in this first world. Life moves forward for us but in a very different way. That hole, that loss, that infinite missing and longing...it never really gets "better" it's just different. It's a wound that never really heals. As time passes, it forms a protective covering but it's very thin and can be ripped away by something as commonplace as a scent or a song. We laugh and celebrate but always with an ache...sometimes it takes our breath away and other times it causes our cheeks to glisten with tears for a time gone by but more often it brings a warm feeling way down deep knowing that we are so much richer for having loved those folks so deeply.
I miss my Dad. I make no excuses...I miss him every day and feel his absence in a very real ways every day. Sometimes that missing brings a flood of tears, sometimes a feeling of inconsolable longing but mixed with that is ALWAYS a warmth and love that is inexplicable...I can't describe it, it's something you have to experience. People tire of hearing about the loss of our loved ones but I don't think I'll ever be ready to stop talking about my Dad. Giving him over to eternity has brought to the forefront the loss of my grandparents. I miss them more now then I did when the loss was fresh. I think it also has a great deal to do with the fact that my own children are growing up...entirely too quickly, might I add! I am beginning to realize that sooner than I'm really ready for it, things are going to change within my four walls. I think that only adds to my reflective state.
My Dad's passing has also made me more intentional with my Mom. My mom is not the type to gush and smooch and hug...I'm like that as well. However, I think since Dad's death we've both become more intentional with the expression of our love - showing it rather than it just being inferred. I'm not going to lie, it's difficult for me because by nature I'm just not that way. I can be that way and many of my treasured friends will tell you that they may randomly receive big mushy emails or messages from me during particularly nostalgic times (which probably annoy them...sorry). I've just come to realize that the people we love won't always be here with us. Many things can separate us from those we love...death, geography and change. So, I decided that those I love would never have to wonder - I'm going to tell them while I have them in their earthly vessels that I love them and that they are treasured by me. That's one regret I don't have with my Dad...I knew he loved me and he knew I loved him. The people who are precious to our hearts...they should know it! We should tell them! Don't say, "I'll tell them tomorrow"or "I'll see them again sometime"! If geography prevents a visit...send them a note! If you can see them...squeeze them tight and tell them you love them! If it's an old friend, tell them how treasured your time together is in your heart and that you love them. Tell your family...show the people around you that you love them! BE INTENTIONAL!
This season in my life is interesting...it's a melting pot of emotions from all directions. It's a blessing and curse - my heart wells up when I think of the many people who have touched and continue to touch my life, whether near or far. It also brings a sense of sadness that many of you are far away (separated by geography or circumstance) no matter the situation, I hold each of you close in my heart.
I miss my Dad but am so very grateful that my Mom is able to spend the holidays with us. We don't talk too much about Dad or memories when we're together...I think it's too hard and we haven't come far enough in the journey to do it without tears. It's odd that even as an adult I still don't know what to do with my Mother's tears. But those moments from the past are shared with a knowing look or a random remark. We share the same memories, albeit from different perspectives.
I have a red berry & cedar candle that I burn every year at Christmas time...reminds me of Christmases when I was the preacher's daughter at Fincastle UMC. That simple candle brings back a flood of wonderful memories for me along with mixed emotions of happiness and longing. Sometimes I long for the days "up the valley" in house heated by an oil furnace, the only phone in the house hanging on the wall in the kitchen, rabbit ear antennas, TVs with no remote, a Christmas tree sprayed with canned snow and lit by multi-colored lights with GIANT bulbs and stockings full of fruit and candy canes. I miss the silver tree with the color wheel at my Nanny's house and the homemade chocolate pie but one thing that I don't have to miss...THE LOVE! I feel that love every time a memory comes to mind and while I can't hug those necks, their love crosses the veil of Heaven like a gentle breeze and sweeps over me and warms my heart, makes me smile and yes, brings a tear.
I am infinitely grateful for the blessing of my life and the life my husband and I have made with our children. Life is a journey and ours is full of twists and turns, ups and downs and everything in between but the one thing that is constant is LOVE! We love each other through it all.
I pray that this Christmas and every day beyond brings each of us the love of those we have in our lives and those who are loving us from the other shore and that we seize EVERY opportunity to LOVE!
Merry Christmas!
The Preacher's Daughter
Saturday, January 11, 2020
And suddenly...it HITS me!!!
Since my Daddy passed away, I have had this overwhelming longing to return to the places of my childhood - to see the people that knew him either personally or through me. A desire to touch again those moments and those people who loved me and knew me "when"...
I keep trying to figure out why...why do I feel like I not only want to but NEED to go and sit in those places and at the feet of those wonderful people who knew me when I was young and my Ross family still intact...and then, IT HIT ME!!! I am an only child and these people from my childhood/youth are like siblings or extended family members to me. They can talk about my Dad and not just in an ethereal way...they knew him and knew me and now, that is all the more precious to me.
I think, if you come from a large nuclear family (nuclear as in your immediate family...NOT the glowing in the dark kind) and you lose a parent, you have those siblings with whom to commiserate. Siblings to remind you of how it was "back in the day" and they, too have memories and stories that others won't and they can and should share them...often!
I keep trying to figure out why...why do I feel like I not only want to but NEED to go and sit in those places and at the feet of those wonderful people who knew me when I was young and my Ross family still intact...and then, IT HIT ME!!! I am an only child and these people from my childhood/youth are like siblings or extended family members to me. They can talk about my Dad and not just in an ethereal way...they knew him and knew me and now, that is all the more precious to me.
I think, if you come from a large nuclear family (nuclear as in your immediate family...NOT the glowing in the dark kind) and you lose a parent, you have those siblings with whom to commiserate. Siblings to remind you of how it was "back in the day" and they, too have memories and stories that others won't and they can and should share them...often!
Friday, January 10, 2020
Nothing to fear but fear itself and everything in between
*NOTE: Since the original writing of this post, the Lord has brought me a long way with regard to fear and worry. Every day, I confess that spirit worry to Him and trust Him to go before, behind, above, below and beside me.
Since my Dad's death on November 21, 2012 I have lived in fear! There hasn't been a day that I can recall since his death that I haven't been worried or fearful. There are days when my fears reduce me to a heap on the floor. I HATE IT!!!! I hate being a mess, being vulnerable, feeling helpless and victimized but it happens to me a LOT in relationship to fear. I have moments when I feel as though I'm having an out of body experience (no, I've never been abducted by aliens although I'm sure many have wondered over the years -LOL). The fear grips my heart so tightly that I can hardly breathe and I can't get away from it. I can't hide from it because it ALWAYS finds me.
Since my Dad's death on November 21, 2012 I have lived in fear! There hasn't been a day that I can recall since his death that I haven't been worried or fearful. There are days when my fears reduce me to a heap on the floor. I HATE IT!!!! I hate being a mess, being vulnerable, feeling helpless and victimized but it happens to me a LOT in relationship to fear. I have moments when I feel as though I'm having an out of body experience (no, I've never been abducted by aliens although I'm sure many have wondered over the years -LOL). The fear grips my heart so tightly that I can hardly breathe and I can't get away from it. I can't hide from it because it ALWAYS finds me.
One thing I know for sure FEAR IS A THIEF!!! It robs me of my peace and strips me of my joy! And folks, let me tell you...that makes me MAD!!!!
Thursday, January 9, 2020
It feels like yesterday and forever
Fall is in the air...the mornings are a little crisper and the evenings a little cooler. The air isn't quite so heavy and the good hair days start to outweigh the bad hair days. This has always been one of my favorite seasons...in recent years it's a bittersweet season for me as I find my way back to complete faith and total trust in God. It's a more difficult journey than I could have ever anticipated. Being raised in a household of faith, I didn't see this season coming. This season of uncertainty and doubt...never thought I'd be here or at least not this long. It scares me!
I want to go back to being ok...I want to go back to being the person I was before losing someone I loved changed me...and not just momentarily...it has changed me FOREVER! I will never again be the same person I was before Dad died. "Dad died"...it still sounds so unreal - I still find myself finding it difficult to believe...but it IS real! Very painfully REAL!
I miss my daddy everyday but some days are harder than others...some moments are more difficult than others. There are moments on a cool fall evening when I'm riding in my van with windows down and I hear the song of the cicada and remember the many nights riding with my Dad up the valley when we lived in LaFollette or home from a ballgame when we lived out on Bates Pike in Cleveland. I can't describe how heavy my heart becomes when I think about the fact that I'll never ride with my Dad again in this life. I'll never get to talk about the resurgence of UT football with him, sit and listen to his hilarious high school stories (I wish I had written them all down somewhere) or sit under his teaching of the Word. I miss everything about him every single day!
Death changes everything! It changes the way you look at and see every situation! Every aspect of your life is eternally altered. I find myself many many times thinking and saying "IT'S NOT FAIR!" And in the flesh, it's not fair but for eternity...it's all good. My hope through this journey is that when I push through the pain and sadness, that on the other side I'll find the strong faith that my father had bubbling up inside of me. That I'll have the unwavering trust that He does have a plan to prosper me and not to harm me. The evidence that all things have worked together for good because I do love Him and want to love Him more. When I find myself on the other side of this season, my prayer is that the person I become is the person that God intends me to be.
My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus' blood and righteousness...
Pressing on...
L
I want to go back to being ok...I want to go back to being the person I was before losing someone I loved changed me...and not just momentarily...it has changed me FOREVER! I will never again be the same person I was before Dad died. "Dad died"...it still sounds so unreal - I still find myself finding it difficult to believe...but it IS real! Very painfully REAL!
I miss my daddy everyday but some days are harder than others...some moments are more difficult than others. There are moments on a cool fall evening when I'm riding in my van with windows down and I hear the song of the cicada and remember the many nights riding with my Dad up the valley when we lived in LaFollette or home from a ballgame when we lived out on Bates Pike in Cleveland. I can't describe how heavy my heart becomes when I think about the fact that I'll never ride with my Dad again in this life. I'll never get to talk about the resurgence of UT football with him, sit and listen to his hilarious high school stories (I wish I had written them all down somewhere) or sit under his teaching of the Word. I miss everything about him every single day!
Death changes everything! It changes the way you look at and see every situation! Every aspect of your life is eternally altered. I find myself many many times thinking and saying "IT'S NOT FAIR!" And in the flesh, it's not fair but for eternity...it's all good. My hope through this journey is that when I push through the pain and sadness, that on the other side I'll find the strong faith that my father had bubbling up inside of me. That I'll have the unwavering trust that He does have a plan to prosper me and not to harm me. The evidence that all things have worked together for good because I do love Him and want to love Him more. When I find myself on the other side of this season, my prayer is that the person I become is the person that God intends me to be.
My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus' blood and righteousness...
Pressing on...
L
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)